Happiness/Misery -- There's a Difference?

Father Leo's Daily Reflection

HAPPINESS
"We are looking in the wrong places for happiness."
Robert J. McCracken

I sought happiness in the bottle. Others looked for "good feelings" in drugs, food or other people. Today I know that nothing that is outside of me can make me acceptable --- acceptance must come from within. I need to discover that spiritual place where I can be acceptable to me.

Self-esteem is an essential part of my recovery and that can only be realized by making the spiritual journey within. Today I seek to discover me. I want to know me --- because You created me.




ME?
I was always lookin' for love in all the wrong places. I'm my own worst gremlin -- sabotore of my relationships and my sobriety. Hell, a good title for the video could have been It's Your Wonderful Life, Susan DeAngelis. Since I could remember, I thought self-esteem could be bought with some highlights, a new pair of boots, hours at the gym, a man on my arm and master's degree on my wall.

Huh, was I wrong. No really, was I wrong?

But seriously folks, my way or the highway hasn't worked; the Father must be right. Acceptance and self-esteem must be found within. And I hear from a wise source, the strength is already inside me, ready for the using.

Glinda, the Good Witch from the North, as said to Dorothy when asked for a ride home: You don't need my help any longer; You always had the power to go back to Kansas.

So I'll give it a try -- click my red converse kicks together, flip to the Discovery Channel and begin another spiritual journey -- semi open minded and practically positive.

I sure hope it's not SHARK week.

Sue

What and where is the origin of your happiness?

Project -- Day 1, Day 1, Start Over Again

From Daily Reflections...

"I HAD DROPPED OUT"
We might next ask ourselves what we mean when we say that we have "harmed" other people. What kinds of "harm" do people do one another, anyway?

To define the word "harm" in a practical way, we might call it the result of instincts in collision, which cause physical, mental, emotional, or spiritual damage to people.
TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS , p. 80

ME?

I think I'm a decent person. Just the other day, I helped an old woman get a can of tomatoes from the top shelf at the supermarket -- a big deal for a woman only 5' 4'' on a big hair day. I say please, thank you, your welcome and always hold the door open for others. Hell, I even let my daughter have the last piece of pizza for dinner last night.

"I don't harm anyone," I thought.

But deep inside, I know I do. I harm myself. In fact, I torture myself.

Today's my 7 year anniversity of sobriety, but I don't feel like celebrating. I want to treat it like any other day. Maybe it's because I don't feel worthy -- or sober for that matter. Just another example of my daily dose of self thoathing.

Today I realize that my brain's a crazy place to live -- amongst the scurrying squirrels, sarcasim and low self esteem. It used to be a nice place ot visit, but today I certainly don't want to live here anymore.

Now, stop it Sue. Day 1...